blast from the past....they made these years ago...in there first public daycare...THESE are the memories i want to keep for them...the memories that they will pass on and on and on

My decision to do a family picture MYSELF and then use it either as a card or something to put INTO the card did NOT go off with out a hitch...

Something usually has to go wrong. That's just the way it is in my universe.

The weather was so uncooperative....it was so freakishly cold...frigid. And yes... I know it is December but c'mon now... TOO COLD...

I knew what I wanted my crew to wear but my sister and her son had no clue what they wanted to wear so I was bombarded with

'what do i weeeeeeeeeeeeeeear???'

I wanted Saturday....I told everyone Saturday at 3:30pm...so why, at 2:45pm, did I get the call 'I'm just not readyyyyyyyyyyyyy....' and then of course...there are the actual photo's...

yes...I have the huge cheesy fake grin on...the boys look great but there I am...showing all 5000 teeth....

They were actually trying to heft my booty up and over the railing...I got nervous and was trying to bring my booty back down to solid ground but Jalil...unaware of the situation going on is looking away and STILL trying to push me up over the edge...

my niece who is like a daughter....yes...she does have that many teeth...and then i have to ask...'what is Okoye and Quinten looking at???' geez Jalil looks so handsome!!! even though he wasnt suppossed tohave that jean jacket on but it was COLD

one of my older sisters and her son....WHO HAS AN ISSUE KEEPING HER EYES CLOSED DURING PHOTO OP'S.....

after this shot...I called it a day.....

but over all we had a really good family time...and i love that.

we muddle through these relationships...


of being ex's (husbands/wife, sister's/brothers, and mother/fathers)...having steps (step-mother's and step-grandmothers) ...and still mangaging to be a very close knit family...

they can be extremely goofy without even trying...but the love is SO there but in the end...

it all kinda works itself out...

for the good....

Its not the load that brings you done...its the way you carry it

~Lena Horne

* my great niece Mia gives THE BEST HUGS in the world...she will be one year old next month. Her sister Ava, gives great hugs, too but she's a little stingy with them. It takes Ava awhile to warm up and then once she does...she crawls all over me, grabbing tight yelling 'Auuunnnnnnnnt Yackkkkkkky!' Seriously... she screams it at the top of her lungs even when I'm sitting

right beside her

Mia...now, once she catches sight of me she gives me this intense stare...deep soul searching stare, then this huge grin like 'where have you BEEN?!' Once I pick her up, she burrows her head into my neck grabs both of my arms really tight and she sighs...like she's taking all the worries, stress and problems out of me and replacing it with her child like innocent and love...

gotta love it.

my sweet Jalil...now this is a face i could photograph all day...

and he's sweet enough to let me do it...

I am having a love affair with faces lately...I tend to not take a lot of photo's full on with the face but here lately..I do love to zoom in.

When you look up dis-satisfaction in Wikipedia...it redirects you to contentment...how odd is that? Why would it do that...but any way...my thoughts are not about why my word search is being directed to the complete opposite of what I'm looking up. My thoughts are about my dis-satisfaction...

I. AM. DISSATISFIED.

In every meaning of the word....

(1)The feeling of being displeased and discontent. (2.) The state of being dissatisfied, unsatisfied and/discontented. Uneasiness proceeding from the want of gratification or from disappointed wishes and expectations.

I dont know when it happened. Why it happened I just know...contentment is not in the cards for me lately. I'm sure most people thing and feel like being dissatisfied is a bad thing. Wikipedia says that generally people who feel this when someone feels that reality is less than ideal. In my opinion, if I am feeling this then I am aware. Aware of me and my feelings. Knowing that something is wrong and that something needs to be done about it. If I did not feel this than...maybe things would be a lot worse than I thought.

Its not that want to win millions of dollars in the lottery (hmmm that doesnt sound half as bad as I thought it would)....I dont want to own my own company...I dont want a bigger house...I just know that...things can not keep going the way they are going...

"I came that everyone would have life and have it in its fullest" John 10:10

I dont have young ones to go trick-or-treating but every once in awhile I borrow other kids for my purposes, LOL....




my great niece Ava Rae

annnnnnnnnnnnd

my great niece Mia